News & reading
Short dispatches from the patterns people write to us about, longer explainers on the same questions, and our own numbers — nothing borrowed, nothing invented. Every piece links to the test that measures it.
The first thirty seconds of a fight — and the week after.
Shutting down during conflict is a nervous-system response, not a character flaw. The four exit patterns — and what yours costs.
Runs on: Load & Exit → Conflict · ExplainerKeeping score isn’t pettiness — it’s what happens when fairness feels uncertain and unspoken. The three fairness states.
Runs on: Load & Exit → Conflict · ExplainerThere’s no rule about who texts first — what matters is whether repair happens at all, and whether it’s always the same person.
Runs on: Load & Exit →Reading about a pattern is step one. Seeing yours takes about five minutes.
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